Privately With Flynn

Your mind learned, a long time ago, that if it could analyze the thing, predict the thing, and perform well enough, you’d be safe. It was right. That strategy kept you safe. It also built your life including your work, relationship patterns, reputation, the standards you hold, and your edge.

So we want to honor it forever. But the instrument that built everything you have is now the wall between you and the life it was supposed to give you.

Maybe you are the most capable person in almost every room, but somehow everyone else seems to be more in contact than you are.

This is not a deficiency to be fixed. It’s a survival strategy that succeeded so completely it outlived its usefulness; and it will keep succeeding, keep you safe, keep you small and sealed, for the rest of your life, unless something interrupts it.

Actually, interrupt isn’t the right word. The right word is metabolize.

The way to actually transform a system is not to complain about it, fight it, or shame it. Those strategies actually reinforce the system you seek to change.

The path is to create a new system that is so good, with such great capacity for compassion and forgiveness, that it metabolizes the old system. Uses it as fuel to invest in the creation of the new way of being.

This isn’t therapy, and it isn’t coaching-as-optimization. It’s the practice of spiritual advancement and the path of mastery.

We are cultivating a way of being. Meaning, making a choice about the internal state you wish to stabilize, usually that’s a state of deep fulfillment and peace, and learning to make contact with the parts of you that decided, sincerely, that staying in a contracted, protective state was the safest thing. We will show them that the safer and truer thing is to open.

This is the slow, precise work of becoming the experiencer of your life rather than its analyst. Of turning your analytical gift from a wall into an instrument, something you enjoy rather than something you’re imprisoned by. Of meeting what you were conditioned to believe was unlovable about you, and watching your reality reorganize around the truth of what you actually want.

It is a particular journey, and it tends to be a generative one — because as your world becomes a truer reflection of you, it also surfaces the deeper distortions, and you build the capacity to meet those too.

Meaning, as your external world becomes a truer reflection of who you really are, it’s like healthy, diverse top soil that allows for the deeper, more buried material to surface.

This is the work of a life, and together we make it your default mode of operating.

I’ve been a practitioner for more than a decade, but the credential that matters most, to me, is that I needed this work before I could ever offer it.

I graduated at the top of my class at the University of Pennsylvania in a graduate program studying Applied Psychology. I could conceptualize at a very high level, and I was quietly drowning. Through my twenties I lived inside a depression dark enough that, at its worst, I wasn’t sure I’d make it past 30, driven by a relentless fear that I would never actually become the person I could feel I was capable of being. I had all the understanding in the world – like, even ten years ago I was speaking about a lot of what I speak about now – but it wasn’t fully reaching me.

What freed me was not another framework. It was learning to be the concepts rather than using them as thin veils between myself and the world; learning, slowly, to make contact with myself as love would.

The thing I found, and the thing my entire practice now rests on, is that there is really no such thing as the outside world. Every time I can’t make full, intimate contact with something beyond me, it’s because there’s something within me I’ve refused, or haven’t yet learned, to touch.

So my life now is an ongoing, ever-present commitment to finding what I’ve buried and learning to make contact with it. I call this reaching up into heaven while simultaneously reaching down into hell. The more I own the truth of what I really want and make progress toward it, the more I get to reach down into my own personal hell, transmuting what was formerly dark and damp into light and vitality.

Every time, at every step, this activates more of the magnificent intelligence that was always there, and deepens my sense of belonging to the totality of things.

I’m a relentless learner — systems theory, ecology, evolutionary biology and psychology, the frontier work of thinkers like Rupert Sheldrake and Michael Levin. And the most important training ground in my life isn’t intellectual at all: I’m married to someone I would choose across infinite lifetimes, we have our first child arriving this October, and my relationship remains the truest mirror I own — the place that keeps revealing, with great precision, exactly what I have not yet learned to meet with love.

This is the work I do with you. I can only take you as far as I have been willing to go myself, and I am still going.

Investment: $2,400 USD / month, or $13,000 USD paid in full.

Admission is by application. I take on a small number of people at a time, and only where the fit is real on both sides. If, through your application, we seem like a great fit, I’ll reach out to schedule a free first session to help you decide if this is the right decision.